Several holidays ago my wife and I was having a late night discussion about the holidays and how much of a success the holiday season was for us.  She told me that she was talking to her mother who was in Mainland China at the time.  She told her mother that we had had a great Christmas.  Her mother asked her what we did!  My wife told her that we had a family dinner which included, her and I of course, her sister, my son and my son’s mother, (my x-wife).

Her mother responded by saying:  You guys are living in such great harmony.  My wife said, “What do you mean mother”?  Her mother said, let me explain with a short story:

Several months ago, China’s leadership, being concern about China’s rapid growth was becoming concern about the direction of the country.  They wanted to make sure that China was growing in the “best direction for all it’s people”, they invited several world renowned thinkers to come speak with them about the direction of China’s growth.  One of these people was A Monk who now lives in Rolling Heights Ca. and is the Head Monk at the Rolling Height Temple! 

When ask the question, how should China proceed, this distinguish Monk responded as follows:   I am not a Politician, BUT I will tell you a short story which goes like this:

There was this family who lived in a small country town. There was the father, the mother, one son and one daughter. One cold winter morning just after the father and son had went to work the mother, while cleaning near the front door, noticed that there were four men standing near the front gate to their home.

The mother, realizing that they had to be very cold and very hungry went out to them and asked them to come inside and get worm and some food. One of the men asked the mother, “who is inside with you? The lady responded, only my daughter, my son and husband is at work!  The man responded, we cannot come into your home while your son and husband is not there, it would be inappropriate.

The mother understood and went back inside. Shortly after her son and husband returned home. The mother told them what had happened and they both respected the four men and decided that she should again invite them in to eat and get warn.  The mother went back to the men and said “my son and husband has returned home and we all would like to invite you all into our home."

The leader said, sorry, we have our rules.  Only one of us can come in at time.  Who would you like to come inside first?  What are your names the lady replied?  

Our names are:   Health, Wealth, Peace and Harmony.  Who would you like to come in first?  The lady decided that she had better ask the rest of her family so she went back inside and explained their conditions for being able to enter their home.  By this time everyone knew these were very special men. When asked who he wanted to enter first, the son said:  Have wealth come in first. The father said have Health come in first.  The mother said let’s have Peace come in first.  The daughter, being the last allowed to speak, said that she felt that Harmony should be allowed to come in first.

They finally agreed with the daughter. The mother went back to the men and told them that they had all agreed that they wanted to ask Harmony to come in first.  As the lady turned and proceeded to go back inside her home she noticed that all four men were following her.  She was confused. The leader of the men said, “You have asked for Harmony to enter your home first”.  Because you have ask for Harmony to enter your home first we are all allowed to come in!   Had you NOT asked for Harmony first, we could only enter ... one at a time!

My wife’s mother said, “You guys are living in such beautiful Harmony”!  My wife and I seems to see eye on at least a few things.  BUT one of the things that we can usually agree on quickly is this:  In order for me to love her, I must care about those that she cares about.  And Visa Versa!

Dowdy's Axiom:  You cannot love your kid(s) and hate his/her father or mother, it simply does not compute. I hope that you enjoyed this little story as much as I did when my wife told it to me!  Site Index / Read Next!